Wordless Wednesday, But Not...

Thought i'd come over and do a little post. Not much for social media these days. Oh I get on but I just browse and look and see what everyone is up to. It was fun seeing all the back to school pics. Samantha took William to his first day of High School as a freshman. And NO picture... I guess I can't complain.. How does the ol saying go? Want something done right and all that?

For the last month William has been in summer band camp. Loves it. They practice 4 in the afternoon to almost 9 at night during the week and he's not complained a single time. They even make the kids run and because of that, he doesn't have to take an athletics class in school. The band marches so that qualifies as exercise.

This past weekend we lost a part of our family. Sometimes I think losing a pet can be more crushing than a person. They are nothing but pure goodness and love and always wanting of you. Just about breaks you. We all have our own way of grieving too. Me, I tend to make sure everyone else is getting by ok, slipping every now and then. I have my breakdowns just like my confrontations, in private. Well, unless needed for whatever reason. But, it's that first routine thing that you normally do that next time that gets you.

I was the medicine lady, lol. Every morning I would give Pepe his seizure meds and Sophie would get her pretend medicine (treat) along with him. Normally its a big deal to eat and give meds. Lots of yipping and tap dancing all around. I would always end up chasing Pepe off when getting food because he would stalk me. So I would turn around when he was at my heels and chase him off while he'd make a B line for the food bowl and more times than not, side belly flop getting there. Then have Sophie attack him like the bully she has always been. Sometimes it was quite comical.

These days, not so much now. No claw tapping across the floor or little yips from him in anticipation. No one for Sophie to bully and she looks in multiple directions when I mention "time for medicine" seeing if Pepe is coming. I have to walk away and gather my wits. Change is doable until it comes to change you can barely grasp, let alone understand. We have these lovely beings in our lives, our whole lives, but it was with Pepe that made me revisit past losses of our furry friends.

I was with Pepe when he passed. I took care of him in the hours before so. Tim was there more so before but I had taken up caring for him thru the night and into the morning so Tim could take Will to get shoes. Pepe was Tims dog. I wasn't suppose to get attached. Sophie was mine. So what the hell happened? All the 7 years that I have known Pepe he's been so much apart of Tims life that he weaseled his way into mine and I didn't even see it coming until He passed.

I believe God had it the way he wanted it when Tim left and Pepe was called home. It was devastating enough when Tim did get back to rush to him afterwards. I don't think Tim needed to witness Pep's passing. It's just that simple. I look back and all the fur babies that I have loved were taken care of, in the end, by someone else. Growing up we had a few that mom or dad saw to in their end times and my ex husband saw to my loving three legged dog, Reddy when he passed. Pepe was my first to be someone else's and me take that burden for them. And all I can keep thinking about is that i'm glad that I could.

I can sit here and say its not fair that we loose them so quickly, but then again, it's as it needs to be and how it should be. These little loves teach us if we only care to observe or listen. And we wonder why we end up loving another again. Thru them we reach that total unconditional love that God feels so much for us. We still have Sophie. I know she'll pass as well. And we'll be there to love her and take care of her as she does for us. When her time comes, i'll accept that burden. And thank God every day that we were allowed to know one another.