Bullying
This issue gets my goat every time. I just read an article on Today.com's website where14-year-old Jamey Rodemeyer was found dead outside his New York home after being continuously bullied. And did the fecking bullying STOP afterwards? Hell no, it didn't. The freaking kids that were doing it just moved to a different target. Jamey's sister. After the wake for Jamey the sister was allowed to attend a high school homecoming dance where when Jamey's favorite singer, Lady Gaga, came on all his friends cheered for him and then all the kids that had bullied Jamey screamed and chanted that they were glad he was dead.
I would have been arrested. I wouldn't have held myself accountable for any of my actions against the parents or the kids themselves. Knowing all too well what bullying can do to a person first hand in dealing with it when I was a freshman and then a few years ago with my son being in the fourth grade I see both sides as the adult who has gone through it and then having a child go through it. The emotional damage can be tremendous. And yes, with me, I finally told my mom what was going on but with William he wouldn't have said a word if not for his older sister, Samantha.
Back in the day I had a half crazed mom who went to bat for me and took it straight to the bully's parent. Luckily, both moms did their best to deture the older girls hostility. Some how it worked and we didn't quite become friends but after a back surgery the girl bully had to undergo and then a few weeks later I ran across her needing assistance in a fight and helped her out. Only then did we part ways with her leaving me alone. Over the years I have run into her with her personality totally different. Some aren't so lucky and I don't know why she had a change of heart. I only got her out of the beat down she was getting because i don't like seeing anyone be ganged up on and she was out numbered. If it were a fair fight with one on one I might have just walked on by. But, maybe it was a lesson she needed to learn the hard way.
Williams stint with bullying started in the 3rd and escalated into the fourth grade. There was one certain kid that was an upper class man that kept picking on him on the bus. With Will being in the 3rd he was in the fifth grade. Since it was only on the bus because the kids went to different schools Sam was the one to step up to bat for Will and step up she did. She wouldn't think twice going up against this boy or any of his friends and a time or two she did just that to protect William, coming home in tears because she was so extremely furious. The morning after hearing this I ended up stopping the bus driver, getting on the bus and going toe to toe with her regarding this. After that the bullying stopped and a new bus driver was assigned as to watch the kids a little more closely.
But, the next year came around and with us moving into a duplex down the street from where we lived with mom, it brought William just that much more closer to his bully's back yard. I hadn't known that the bullying had started back up again until Sam ran over to Tim's house where I was and grabbed us both yelling that the bully and his friends had just shot William with a pellet gun. Oh God I was livid. Like my own mom did Tim and I took it to the parents. Come to find out I went to school with the dad who was a volunteer fire fighter for our town and had no clue what his son had been up to. The bullying stopped after dad became aware of things and with that came a two page apology letter to William from the bully. But being the parent and being on a different level of helplessness that I couldn't just go and grab this kid up myself I stuck William in karate. William never liked talking about any kind of bullying unless it was happening to someone else and he was the one that got in trouble by the school for defending whomever it was that got bullied so I knew that we just needed to redirect Wills self esteem to get it raised up to wear he WOULD defend himself or at least stand up to the bullies of today.
William hasn't been bullied in two years now but that's not to say they aren't out there waiting for some kid to come along for whatever reason just to give them an excuse to bully. Hate is a very strong word for me so I don't use it lightly when I say that I hate bully's. Both girls and boys alike. For me, it brings out such an enraging feeling that I know that I could possibly cause bodily harm to whomever my kids aggressor was. I know this because Sam also had a girl that caused crap with her all the time a few years back. I didn't handle it like I did with Will because Sam gave as much as she got but never upped the ante by making it physical. The other girl did and when I tried talking the girl down she wasn't having any of it and by whatever means necessary she would beat the heck out of my kid. Me telling the girl to sit tight, that I was on my way to put my hands on her left Tim jumping up and blocking my way. That fecking helplessness consumes your mind and you just can't think clearly. Wasn't too smart trying to bust out of my own house to go beat up a 16 year old but damn that girl was talking like a grown woman and she was fixing to get as good as she got by me.
So, that's my rant for today. A little on the aggressive side but then again I wish I had billions to take bullies on a little plane ride to a destination to some remote compound of my choosing to whip these kids into shape where they are more humbled in their hate for others that are so easily picked out and harassed. Kind of like the TV show Bully Beat Down with me being the head of the group..
I would have been arrested. I wouldn't have held myself accountable for any of my actions against the parents or the kids themselves. Knowing all too well what bullying can do to a person first hand in dealing with it when I was a freshman and then a few years ago with my son being in the fourth grade I see both sides as the adult who has gone through it and then having a child go through it. The emotional damage can be tremendous. And yes, with me, I finally told my mom what was going on but with William he wouldn't have said a word if not for his older sister, Samantha.
Back in the day I had a half crazed mom who went to bat for me and took it straight to the bully's parent. Luckily, both moms did their best to deture the older girls hostility. Some how it worked and we didn't quite become friends but after a back surgery the girl bully had to undergo and then a few weeks later I ran across her needing assistance in a fight and helped her out. Only then did we part ways with her leaving me alone. Over the years I have run into her with her personality totally different. Some aren't so lucky and I don't know why she had a change of heart. I only got her out of the beat down she was getting because i don't like seeing anyone be ganged up on and she was out numbered. If it were a fair fight with one on one I might have just walked on by. But, maybe it was a lesson she needed to learn the hard way.
Williams stint with bullying started in the 3rd and escalated into the fourth grade. There was one certain kid that was an upper class man that kept picking on him on the bus. With Will being in the 3rd he was in the fifth grade. Since it was only on the bus because the kids went to different schools Sam was the one to step up to bat for Will and step up she did. She wouldn't think twice going up against this boy or any of his friends and a time or two she did just that to protect William, coming home in tears because she was so extremely furious. The morning after hearing this I ended up stopping the bus driver, getting on the bus and going toe to toe with her regarding this. After that the bullying stopped and a new bus driver was assigned as to watch the kids a little more closely.
But, the next year came around and with us moving into a duplex down the street from where we lived with mom, it brought William just that much more closer to his bully's back yard. I hadn't known that the bullying had started back up again until Sam ran over to Tim's house where I was and grabbed us both yelling that the bully and his friends had just shot William with a pellet gun. Oh God I was livid. Like my own mom did Tim and I took it to the parents. Come to find out I went to school with the dad who was a volunteer fire fighter for our town and had no clue what his son had been up to. The bullying stopped after dad became aware of things and with that came a two page apology letter to William from the bully. But being the parent and being on a different level of helplessness that I couldn't just go and grab this kid up myself I stuck William in karate. William never liked talking about any kind of bullying unless it was happening to someone else and he was the one that got in trouble by the school for defending whomever it was that got bullied so I knew that we just needed to redirect Wills self esteem to get it raised up to wear he WOULD defend himself or at least stand up to the bullies of today.
William hasn't been bullied in two years now but that's not to say they aren't out there waiting for some kid to come along for whatever reason just to give them an excuse to bully. Hate is a very strong word for me so I don't use it lightly when I say that I hate bully's. Both girls and boys alike. For me, it brings out such an enraging feeling that I know that I could possibly cause bodily harm to whomever my kids aggressor was. I know this because Sam also had a girl that caused crap with her all the time a few years back. I didn't handle it like I did with Will because Sam gave as much as she got but never upped the ante by making it physical. The other girl did and when I tried talking the girl down she wasn't having any of it and by whatever means necessary she would beat the heck out of my kid. Me telling the girl to sit tight, that I was on my way to put my hands on her left Tim jumping up and blocking my way. That fecking helplessness consumes your mind and you just can't think clearly. Wasn't too smart trying to bust out of my own house to go beat up a 16 year old but damn that girl was talking like a grown woman and she was fixing to get as good as she got by me.
So, that's my rant for today. A little on the aggressive side but then again I wish I had billions to take bullies on a little plane ride to a destination to some remote compound of my choosing to whip these kids into shape where they are more humbled in their hate for others that are so easily picked out and harassed. Kind of like the TV show Bully Beat Down with me being the head of the group..
Comments
You've tackled a tough subject here, but you did it well.
I can remember being bullied in the 8th grade; a girl who rode our bus threatened to beat me up every single day when we got off the bus. I tried to ignore her, and skedaddled straight home,sometimes runnning. We eventually became "somewhat" friends.
I've often wondered if kids who bully others have some very deep seeded insecurities, and are trying to make up for it by being nasty to have others notice them. I guess we'll never know. Even kindergarteners "bullY" according to Hunter. :(
hughughugs